A Little Story

This is the shirt that Aaron loves.

It is his lucky interview shirt. He can't wear another shirt. He would have a terrible interview if he wore another shirt. He would stumble all over himself and insult the interviewer IF he wore a different shirt. This shirt does not go down the laundry chute. It may get dirty on the way down the laundry chute. This shirt is very special.

This is what I looked like when I realized that I had accidentally made a terrible dark blue streak across the collar of the shirt that Aaron loves the night before his interview.

These are the chemicals I used to scrub the shirt that Aaron loves after I accidentally made a terrible dark blue streak across the collar of the shirt the night before his interview.

This is the pillow I gratefully collapsed into after the shirt that Aaron loves was finally clean and laundered after I accidentally made a terrible dark blue streak across the collar of the shirt the night before his interview.

This is the child who woke me up exactly 30 seconds later because he was scared and needed his Mom even though it was 2 in the morning and she had been up half the night cleaning the shirt that Aaron loves that accidentally got a dark blue stain on it the night before Aaron's interview.

This is the shirt that Aaron loves.

I don't like this shirt.

A Grateful Heart -

I am having a difficult time with my gratitude post for today because I am sick. I hate being sick. Oh yeah and I can barely walk because I didn't know I would be sick today and so I did a new and very difficult work-out video yesterday and my thighs still feel like rubber. STILL. Gripe. Gripe. Moan. Moan. Get the idea? So today I am going to be grateful for the 98.3 % of the time that I feel healthy and energetic. May tomorrow be one of those days.

P.S. This is not a picture of me. I am not cute and adorable when I am sick. Like Meg Ryan in this movie. I really look sick. And I know you don't want to see it.

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A Grateful Heart - Music

"Gratitude is the beginning of wisdom. Stated differently, true wisdom cannot be obtained unless it is built on a foundation of true humility and gratitude." — Gordon B. Hinckley

I've recently started teaching piano lessons and the experience has brought back to memory my love for music.

Is it just me... or does music call back memories more powerfully than anything else? I have certain songs that I subconsciously link with different people and different times of my life. Barry Manilow will always remind me of my friend Tawni. I never hear a Beatles song without remembering my friend Alex. There is a Colors song called "The Reggae Song" that I first heard while driving home from Park City with my sister. That's when I decided that song was going on my wedding video. And it did. I have a certain song I listen to when I am sad ("I Wish It Would Rain") and a song I listen to when I feel happy ("Thank You Lord"). Finding a song that perfectly matches my mood is so awesome. I also have songs that bring back strong spiritual feelings. Songs that remind me about what is really important. There are times when for whatever reason I feel grumpy, discouraged, argumentative or stressed (I know.... can you believe it?) I have found that almost nothing works better than music to turn around the entire mood of the house. Not just me... but I really believe my children's mood can be lifted with music as well. One author wrote "The only proof [I need] for the existence of God [is] music." There really is something eternal.... a force beyond this world when it comes to good music. So here's to good music that has lifted all of our lives at some time or another.

A Grateful Heart - My Little Man

"When a person doesn’t have gratitude, something is missing in his or her humanity. A person can almost be defined by his or her attitude toward gratitude." — Elie Wiesel


And then came Andrew.... and my heart grew some more....

Writing about Andrew today is fun for me because I am just, kind of, obsessed with the kid right now. To me he is at an incredibly adorable age. His cute expressions, his sweet hugs and his funny conversations just melt my heart. When I think about being happy, I picture those moments when I am watching my kids play and I am laughing. If laughing counts for anything.... then I am supremely grateful for Andrew because he makes me laugh many many times a day. He has the cutest habit lately of putting his face right up to mine so our noses are touching. This is what he does when he wants to tell me something really, really important. And oh... I love Andrew's really important information. (i.e. Dinosaur ate horse and tiger and zebra ran away and hid and Dinosaur was sad.)
My favorite thing about Andrew right now, though, is his simplicity. His needs are not complicated. I have it within my power to kiss better every owie and soothe nearly all his troubles away. "I want Mommy" are words that I have mixed feelings about. I'm normal... I don't like to hear those words at 3 in the morning any more than you do.... but I have to admit that feeling needed and knowing that only I can fill that need.... well.... I like it. I think everyone needs to be needed. Andrew needs me..... I am his world ..... and for now... I kind of like it that way.
So today.... I'm very grateful for my baby... (who by the way is extremely offended at being called a baby... but sometimes I still like to think it.....)

A Grateful Heart - My Joy

"“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” " — Denis Waitley

As I was thinking about my next gratitude post - I was thinking about how differently love comes. When it came to my husband.... my love was a choice. It came slowly and grew over time. I loved him because of his qualities that I admired. I decided that he was worthy of my love and I hoped to be worthy of his. With my children, however, it came differently. When I was pregnant with Lizzy I remember wondering if I would love my baby. I wondered if my heart was big enough to love this little child in addition to everything else I loved. And then she was born.... and I found that my heart didn't have to push something out to make room, it just grew larger. I had a greater capacity to love. My love for her was sudden and powerful from the moment I saw her. Perhaps it was the result of having her as a part of my own body for 9 months, but it seems that she is an extension of me. I know that is not completely accurate but sometimes it feels like it. Her joy is my joy and her pain is my pain. I love her simply because she is mine.

As she continues to grow, I've learned to love her for different reasons as well. I'm grateful for her compassion. I'm grateful for her imagination that entertains me everyday. I'm grateful for the way that she enjoys life and helps me to enjoy it as well. I'm grateful for the joy that she brings to mine and Aaron's families. I'm grateful for the way she absorbs knowledge and wants to know everything about everything. Today is my day to remember how grateful I am for Lizzy Joy.

A Grateful Heart - My Man

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow." — Melody Beattie

I met my husband in highschool. It was a crush in the beginning. I thought he was cute... he thought I was easy to talk to. (Or simply that I made it easy for him to listen and not have to talk much.) We went to dances, watched movies together, studied for classes together and I felt good being around him. Fast forward through 2 more years of highschool, college, a mission, most of medical school, nearly 7 years of marriage and 2 children. This guy that sat one row over and two seats in front of me in English class has become a solid rock in my life. Our times together have been full of joy, romance, absolute bliss and also confusion, pain, struggle and hardship. And through it all... he has been there. Like breathing, I hardly think about his presence in my life anymore. He's just there.... keeping the oxygen moving through my body so that I can think and move and live. But today, when I take a moment to consider what I am truly grateful for.... he is right up there at the top of the list. I know this may be hard to believe but - he really loves me. Even though I "Dear Johned" him on his mission. Even though I disagree with him on many things. Even though I forget 9 times out of 10 to make him a lunch. Even though I can nag and argue with the best of them.... he loves me for exactly who I am. And that.... is the best gift anyone can receive.

So to summarize day one of my Grateful Heart project: I'm thankful for my husband.

Guess what I don't have to buy anymore.

I'm so excited. I'm jumping for joy... right now... as I type.... which is really kind of hard.

Besides...he's so cute in his little dinosaur underpants. I love it.

Smiling to Myself

When I was probably 13 or 14 years old I was walking home from a babysitting job. I didn't know that my brother was watching me as I strolled across our yard. When I reached the house my brother, with some irritation questioned me. "Why are you smiling?"

"I don't know." I said. "I was thinking about something funny."

"Well" he responded, "don't smile when you're all alone... it makes you look like you're crazy."

Maybe that was good advice.... but then again maybe I am CRAZY, because I still sometimes find myself with a big goofy grin.... even when I'm alone.
This is what made me smile today:


All of these library books I'd requested came in at once and I got to pick up a ginormous stack of books. And a large stack of books just gives me a warm happy feeling inside. Just seeing them sit on my bookshelf makes me smile.

This also makes me smile. Yes..... Andrew is learning to use the big boy potty and it makes me very very happy.
Beef jerky makes me smile. I have some downstairs that I could go eat right now if I wanted to. Oh... my mouth is watering... and smiling.

So.... What makes you smile?

One Year Older

On my birthday I woke up to the smell of sizzling bacon. I love the smell of sizzling bacon. Even more, though, I love the man who was exausted, having arrived late that night from an interview in Michigan and had an early morning of work ahead and still woke up even earlier to make me breakfast on my birthday. What more could I ask for? Nothing. I was fully satisfied.

And then... there was one more thing to make the day unforgettable.

Thanks Mom and Nancy. I can't wait to learn how to use this thing. My list of projects is already ridiculously long. What fun!!!

What a Life

I am now entering into my 30th year of life. I think I've had a pretty awesome life. This was a fun list that my friend Rachel posted and so I decided to evaluate my 29 years as well. The things in red I have done and the things in black I haven't.
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band (Rock Band Baby!)
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped (I have no desire to fulfill that one)
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch (sort of)
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort- (I've built many a snow fort)
25. Held a lamb (I've petted one)
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors.
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke (Thanks PartyTime)
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie (I am counting the Killer Dog movie my siblings and I made about 15 years ago)
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check...live and learn right?!
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt (okay it was a wall quilt ... but...)
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job...
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London (I've seen it at Arlington)
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book (My own photo book.)
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible (does it have to be consecutive?!)
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating.
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby (x2)
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100.Visited Italy
What have you done?!

Winter Wonderland

I'm not sure I was prepared for a snowstorm of this magnitude quite yet. Freezing cold winters in Utah can be daunting. But even the worst critic will admit that there is something magical about waking up to find that the world has changed while you were sleeping.

I don't know where we will be living by this time next year... or the following year, but I hope to be in a place where I can watch the seasons change. Because if not I know I would miss....

Cuddling up in bed together and watching the snow fall. Bundling the kids up in their snow gear.... Watching them play in the snow..... catching snowflakes on their tongues and making snow angels.

Warming them up afterward with big fluffly blankets and drinking hot chocolate.....

As long as I can stay warm and cozy inside... I think I love the snow.... atleast for awhile.

Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween from all of us!!!